Hello! I’m Sandra

My parents immigrated to the United States in the early 2000s and as most immigrants families our parents/family members did their best to provide our basic needs and set a better future for us in the states. As my parents were establishing themselves in the US they also were struggling with their own battles in their marriage. Unfortunately, with the Lord’s way not established in our household, strongholds developed in our home. Brokenness was entering in our small family and truly darkness was in the midst. For me personally the stronghold of fear, anxiety, depression, sexual sin and emotionlessness developed in me that I would later on lose the desire to live past the age of 18. There were many moving parts that took place before I was fully delivered from those strongholds, the biggest delay for me was my lack of understanding how important it was to seek Jesus outside of the church building. Don’t get me wrong I am and will always advocate church attendance! Even the Bible tells us to not stop congregating with each other. Those church services are what helped me hear the word of God when it wasn’t in my home. I was exposed to the truth which ultimately led me to be fully free! But my delay was rooted in fear, lack of seeking and lack of God’s guidance in my home. My mother thankfully ran back to God when I was around 11 years old and she did her best to bring my siblings and I to church all the time. So yes I was in church  and somewhat involved prior to my 18th birthday. BUT I had lived a lukewarm lifestyle. On the night of by 18th birthday I felt fear like never before and my mind filled with such negativity. It manifested into pain in my palms as if there were small cuts all over them and it just wouldn’t go away. The thoughts of suicide had intensified this night because I really thought I was unfixable and with a mind so messed up, I didn’t think I would be able to break free from it. This did go on for about four months thankfully I did have some  scripture memorized at that point which helped me see the facts that God was on my side. Finally more months had passed, exhausted, I realized I needed to be fully freed. I needed to place my full trust in God which meant giving him full access to my heart. See I had given God about 85% of myself to him at this point but 100% meant facing traumatic event as a child that I wanted to forget, it meant facing the sin I was bound to, it meant my walls I had spent years building thinking I was able to protect myself needed to be brought down in order for Him to fully work in my life. So I did! For me it took a full year of intensified spiritual warfare to understand that God needed all of me not part. I finally tuned 19 and realized the God of exodus 4:11, He is the one in charge of my life not the Devil not me. I am a child of God forever.